


Rules of the Game

by Browneyesparker



Series: Rules [1]
Category: Girl Meets World
Genre: Angst, F/M, Friendship, Hurt/Comfort, Romance, YA Fiction, girl meets world - Freeform, joshaya
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-01-10
Updated: 2016-02-26
Packaged: 2018-05-13 02:31:43
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 9
Words: 12,876
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5691313
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Browneyesparker/pseuds/Browneyesparker
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Things were going so well between them that she was so sure that Josh would be in her life forever. Until everything changed the summer after she graduated from high school. That’s when things started to get complicated.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Prologue

**_An infinite thank you to boymeetsgmw for the title._ **

 

** Prologue: **

 

**_“Sometimes people don't understand the promises they're making when they make them.”_ **

**_The Fault in Our Stars__ **

“You know it wasn’t meant to be.”

Maya looked at Josh with sadness brimming in her blue eyes and sighed. “Why does everybody keep saying that? Okay, so Riley and Lucas are perfect for each other. It doesn’t mean that _they_ were meant to be. Because sometimes the guy ends up with the imperfect, messy best friend.”

Josh sighed. “Maya. . .”

“Well. It’s true!”

“Maya, you’re only going to be in the 11th grade. You don’t always end up with the person you’re supposed to be with in the 11th grade.”

Maya’s eyes brightened for a second. “You think they might break up again?”

“Nope. I’m sure they’re together for the rest of their lives,” Josh answered. “Maybe they’ll break up a couple more times before they actually get together forever and ever but they are most certainly meant to be."

“So, I was just a distraction for Lucas then?” Maya asked.

Josh knew it was a trap, so he wasn’t going to fall into it. He shook his head. “Nope. You weren’t just a distraction for Lucas. Maybe you were a victim of Riley’s confusion but you were most certainly not a distraction for Lucas. . . I think he liked her the whole entire time.”

“But. . .” Maya trailed off. “Sometimes it seemed so real. I thought. . . but. . . you know I always knew that he still liked her too? Most of the time when he was supposed to be looking at me, he was looking at her. When he was supposed to be talking about me, he was really talking about her.”

“I was always rooting for them to get together,” Josh told her. “I’m sorry.”

“Yeah. The thing is, I don’t think I ever _really_ wanted him,” Maya admitted. “I liked the person he was before he came to New York. Sometimes it would still come out and I dunno. . . but you know it was always for Riley. How could I not see that it was _always_ Riley? You know, I bet we’re the ones who had the sibling relationship this whole time?”

“You and Lucas?” Josh asked.

“Who else?” Maya answered. “It most certainly isn’t Lucas and Riley! Why are you even here? Aren’t you supposed to be on Riley’s side? She is your family after all, I’m just the friend.”

“I _am_ on Riley’s side,” Josh replied. “But that doesn’t mean I can’t be a friend to you. She asked me to talk to you.”

“Oh? To smooth things over or to be my consolation prize?”

“Hey! I will have you know that I am _nobody’s_ consolation prize! I’m the actual _prize_!” Josh said. “And as for smoothing things over, well, I don’t think I have to do _that_. You two aren’t actually having a for real fight.”

“No,” Maya agreed. “Not really. I mean, I _know_ Riley didn’t do anything sneaky to get Lucas back, that she wasn’t even thinking about getting him back. It was all him. You know, he told me that he never really liked me, liked me? Why did he spend so much time dating with me if he didn’t like me?”

Josh shrugged. “I can’t pretend to know why anybody would do things like that. Maybe he was just trying to make Riley happy. Or maybe he was just confused because of the things Riley was saying to him. Besides, it would be very hard not to be attracted to _you_. You are a very pretty girl, Maya.”

Maya waved him off. “You’re just saying that to make me feel better.”

Josh didn’t reply, instead he took a sip of his Coke before clearing his throat and continuing on. “You liked me once. Can’t you like me again?”

“Like a _crush_?” Maya asked.

“Maybe we can be friends,” Josh answered. “We won’t complicate things with crushes or things like that.”

“Good. I’ve had enough complications to last me a _lifetime_ ,” Maya said.  “Let’s set up some ground rules.”

“Ground rules?” Josh repeated. “I think you might be reading too many young adult novels there, Hart.”

“Seriously, ground rules are a good idea,” Maya argued. “It’ll give us a safety net.”

“A safety net for _what_ exactly!?”  Josh asked.

“Not ruining our friendship,” Maya said.

“Maya. . . we don’t need rules. I can promise you that I won’t let anything happen to ruin the friendship,” Josh answered.

“Well, we need to have _one_ rule.”

“What rule?” Josh asked, indulging her.

“No falling in love.”

“Excuse me!?”

“With _each other_ ,” Maya clarified.

Josh laughed. “What happened to the long game, Maya?”

“I’m done with crushes and with falling in love,” Maya answered flatly. “I’ve only ever been disappointed by love.”

“You’re barely even 15 yet! You can’t be over love yet!”

“Just agree that we won’t fall in love!” Maya begged.

“Fine! I _won’t_ fall in love with you!” Josh said. “Are you happy now?”

“No,” Maya answered, scooping up some ice cream and putting it in her mouth. “Not really.”

“I’m going to fix it,” Josh said, smiling at her.

And true to his word, he _did_ fix it and as time went on, they became as close as two friends could be. None of the old feelings Maya had long buried for Josh came back to complicate things even though he _was_ her very favorite date for school functions or any given Friday night when she didn’t want to feel left out when she tagged along with Farkle, Smackle, Riley and Lucas on their dates.

Things were going so well between them that she was so sure that Josh would be in her life forever. Until everything changed the summer after she graduated from high school. That’s when things started to get complicated.

**TBC. . .**

 

**.**


	2. Chapter 2

**.**

**Chapter 1**

**_“Know the rules well, so you can break them effectively.”_ **

**_Dalai Lama XIV__ **

Josh found Maya sitting on the floor in Riley’s room, with her London street scene, midi-skirt fanned out around her, her tablet in her lap and one earbud in her ear. She looked up when she saw him come in and smiled at him, pressing a finger to her lips like she was telling him to be quiet. She motioned for him to come over and pulled him down beside her when he did.

“What are you doing in here?” Josh whispered. “Isn’t this a quarter of your party or something? You graduated today too, didn’t you?”

“Yeah,” Maya answered. “But I needed a break. Everybody’s asking me what college I’m going to and what I’m going to major in.”

“NYU and art,” Josh said. “What’s the big deal? You’ve known about this for months now.”

“Yeah,” Maya replied. “But I’m tired of telling everybody the same thing over and over again. So, here I am.”

“What are you doing?” Josh asked.

“Watching _Downton Abbey_.”

“We just finished watching the series last month,” Josh reminded her as he snatched up her free earbud and put it in his ear. “I like this part.”

“I know,” Maya said. “You only rooted for them to get together for five seasons.”

“It was meant to be,” Josh replied. “Just don’t tell anybody I shipped two people that are old enough to be my grandparents.”

Maya grinned and turned the audio up. “Your secret is _still_ safe with me, Josh.”

When the scene was over, Josh turned to Maya. “So, where’s Riley anyways?”

“On the roof. She and Lucas are playing host and hostess,” Maya answered, powering down her iPad and putting it in its case.

“Anything interesting happen during graduation?”

Maya laughed. “No. They didn’t get engaged like your brother and sister-in-law, if that’s what you mean. But you would have known that if you bothered to show up when you were supposed to.”

Josh tackled her to the floor. “Come on Maya, we talked about that! You know I had to take a final, I couldn’t get out of it.”

“I know! I know! I was only teasing!” Maya said. “Come on, you’ve gotta let me sit up Josh. This outfit wasn’t cheap, you know!”

“I was there when you bought it. Remember? I told you how great you looked!”

“Which is what you’re supposed to do,” Maya answered as he helped her up and she adjusted her black, turtleneck crop top. “That’s another reason I’m inside though, this shirt was getting a little too warm to be outside in.”

Josh smirked. “I told you so.”

“Shut up!” Maya retorted.

“You still look great,” Josh said as he reached out and pushed a lock of blonde hair away from her face.  “You know, I think you’re one of the prettiest girls I’ve ever known.”

“That’s why you call me _gorgeous_ , isn’t it!” Maya asked lightly, she laughed. “I hope you’re going to do something amazing to make up for missing my graduation.”

“Actually, I am!” Josh pulled a velvet box out of his tweed blazer. “Part _un_.”

Maya’s eyes lit up when she opened the box and found a pair of diamond earrings, glittering in the late afternoon sunshine. “What did you do for Riley?” she asked as she removed them from their case and put them on.

“I’m giving her money for her Paris trip,” Josh replied. “I thought she might appreciate that more than jewelry. Besides, she never takes off that Eiffel Tower necklace that Lucas gave to her for her sweet 16.”

Maya went to admire her new gift in the mirror. “I hope you didn’t spend a whole lot on these.”

“They’re a half carat each of cubic zirconia,” Josh answered, smirking at her. “One day when I am a fabulously wealthy architect, I will replace them with the real deal.”

“Cubic zirconia or not, I _love_ them!” Maya breathed as she spun around on her high heeled sandals to give him a hug. “Thank you Josh!”

Josh hugged her back. “Only the best for my best girl!”

“There you two are!” Riley said, coming into her bedroom and folding her arms across her chest as she tried to look at them sternly. “Maya, I know you’ve probably forgotten this by now but this is your party too. There are people wondering where you are. Same with you Uncle Joshua.”

Josh and Maya pushed away from each other, feeling like they had just been caught with their hands in the cookie jar.

Josh looked at Maya sheepishly. “I may have forgotten to go and see my parents when I got here. I should go and do that now.”

“Okay,” Maya agreed. “I’m just going to put on some more lipstick.”

“We’ll be up on the roof a few minutes,” Riley added.

Josh smiled like he knew exactly what was going on. “Okay Riley. I’ll see you both soon.”

As soon as he was gone, Riley turned to Maya. “Oh my gosh! I think he _likes_ you!”

“It isn’t like that with us,” Maya answered as she reapplied her red lipstick. “We have rules.”

“One _stupid_ rule!” Riley said.

Maya capped her lipstick, rubbed her lips together and shook his head. “He promised!”

Riley shook her head. “Well, I think you’re both being _dumb_!”

 **“** No we’re not. Nobody gets hurt this way,” Maya told her.

“Haven’t you ever seen _When Harry Met Sally_?” Riley asked. “A guy and a girl can’t just be friends. Somebody is always going to want more, it’s inevitable.”

“Not true! Neither of us ever wanted something more with _Farkle_!” Maya protested.

“You’ve seen _He’s Just Not That into You_. There are exceptions to every rule,” Riley said. “Mark my words Maya Penelope Hart, someday soon somebody is going to want more and then you’ll both be sorry you even made that stupid rule. Just you wait.”

 “I’m sorry Riley but you don’t know what you’re talking about,” Maya answered.

Riley just smirked.

.

“Maya!” Her half-sister, Ariel squealed when she saw her coming out on the roof. “There you are!”

“Hey sweetie pie!” Maya answered, bending down to give her a hug. She straightened up and turned to her father. “Hi dad, where’s Esperanza?”

“Sorry honey, the twins were sleeping and Eddie was misbehaving. We both thought it would be for the best if she stayed home.” Kermit replied. “She really wanted to be here but sent her apologies and a piece from her new jewelry collection.”

“The one that hasn’t officially been released yet?” Maya asked eagerly, her eyes lighting up.

“Of course,” Kermit answered. “Only the best for her favorite stepdaughter, you know.”

“Um, I really do hope I’m her _only_ stepdaughter,”

Ariel tugged at Maya’s shoulder. “Where’s Joshie?

“I think he’s talking to his parents.”

“Can we go and find him, _please_!?”

Maya laughed. “Sure. Sorry Dad, you know how it is.”

Kermit nodded. “Oh yes, I certainly do! Joshua Matthews _always_ comes first with all the Clutterbucket women. Sometimes, I think even Esperanza likes him better than she likes me.”

“And who can blame her?” Maya teased.

“Well, you certainly like him more than you like most young men,” Kermit teased right back. “I think he’s the only one you’ve brought around these past five years.”

Maya’s eyes widened and she had the sudden urge to cover Ariel’s ears. Her little sister had already asked her _several_ times when she was going to marry Josh, there was no need to encourage her anymore. But now she knew exactly where the questions were coming from. She made a mental note to discuss it with her father and stepmother later when inquiring little ears weren’t around.

She cleared her throat. “Ariel, look, Josh is over by the drinks. Maybe if you ask daddy very nicely, you can go ask Josh to give you a Coke?”

“Can I daddy!?” Ariel pleaded. _“Can I!?”_

“Sure, why not?” Kermit answered, smirking at his oldest daughter over Ariel’s head.

“Daddy,” Maya said, tugging at her ear. “Why don’t you go and hang out with Mr. Matthews and the other dads?”

“Oh, I don’t know sweetheart, Shawn and I still don’t get along very well.”

“Well, you’re just going to have to get over that,” Maya said, giving him a little nudge with the toe of her shoe. “Because both of you will be around each other for a very long time, you know.”

Maya could have sworn she heard Kermit mutter something about how life had been easier when she was holding a grudge against him. But she knew he wasn’t being serious. Neither of them wanted to go back to those days, if they could help it. They had discovered that they liked having each other around.

“Come on,” Maya said to Ariel. “Let’s go and see Joshie. . .  I mean _Josh_. I’m sure that he’s dying to catch up with you, it’s been awhile since we went up to Manhattan to visit you guys.”

Ariel beamed. “Okay!”

“Well come on then!” Maya said.

Ariel slipped her hand into Maya’s and skipped over to where Josh was standing. “Hello Joshie!” she sing-songed.

“Hey Mermaid,” Josh sing-songed back.

“Daddy says you can give me a Coca-Cola,” Ariel told him, turning her beautiful blue eyes towards him.

“Anything for you Re-Re,” Josh answered, taking a glass bottle of Coke for her and twisting the cap off. “There you go.”

“Thanks Joshie!”

“Thanks Joshie!” Maya echoed.

Ariel took a sip and then smacked her lips together. “I need to ask you a question Josh and you _need_ to answer it no matter what it is.”

“Okay, shoot.”

“Are you going to marry my sister?”

“Ariel Taylor Clutterbucket!” Maya scolded.

“Well? Are you?” Ariel demanded, ignoring her big sister.

Josh laughed. “Nope. You see Maya and I have this rule.”

Ariel wrinkled her nose. “A rule? Why?”

“You make rules when you don’t want to get hurt,” Maya explained, giving josh a look. “Right Josh?”

“Right,” Josh agreed, smiling at her.

“Rules are stupid,” Ariel informed them. “We have a bunch of rules at school because they don’t want us to get hurt. But guess what!?”

“What?” Maya asked wearily.

“People always wind up getting hurt anyways,” Ariel answered. “No matter what, they always need a Band-Aid or stitches or an ice pack. One time my friend Jett even needed to go to the hospital and get a cast on his leg. Rules are stupid. They’re meant to be broken.”

**.**

“I’m sorry about Ariel,” Maya said as Josh walked her home later that night, after the party was over.

“It’s fine,” Josh told her. “She’s just a kid, she doesn’t understand what she’s saying.”

“Oh, she understands. Whatever she’s saying she’s hearing from my father and stepmother. I doubt that they’re even trying to hide it from my siblings at this point.”

“Hide what?”

Maya’s eyes widened. “Um, _nothing_. . .” she laughed. “Forget I even said anything. Okay?”

Josh stopped in front of their favorite place to get ice cream. “Okay, I’ll forget about it but only if we can get ice cream before I take you home.”

“You don’t have to ask me twice,” Maya replied as she smiled at him and followed him into the ice cream shop. “But you’re paying, I couldn’t carry around money and wear this outfit at the same time.”

“I will happily pay for you,” Josh told her. “Especially because you look so good in that outfit.”

Maya laughed. “Flattery will get you everywhere, my friend!”

They were as they always were. Maya was sure that her friends and family were just reading into things. Nothing was going to change between them, nothing _could_ change between them. They were too strong for things to change, she was sure of it.

 

**TBC. . .**

 

**.**

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> .
> 
> Author’s Note:  
> I am not sure about the ages of Maya’s siblings, but I’m going to put them between 8 years old and 12 months. For the sake of this story, Maya forgave Kermit for abandoning why. It happened off-screen but you’ll understand why later on why I did it. I will write the forgiveness story in a few chapters. Meanwhile, please tell me what you thought. 
> 
> ella asked me for some YA nominations in a review. The ones I could think of off the top of my head were To All the Boys I’ve Loved Before and P.S I Still Love You by Jenny Han. ALL the books by John Green, the first three Anne of Green Gables books by L.M Montgomery and Love Letters to the Dead by Ava Dellaria. On the more serious side of the spectrum is a MUST read, 13 Reasons Why, I Was Here by Gale Forman and All the Bright Places by Jennifer Niven. I’ll let you know when I come up with more.
> 
> Until Next Time! 
> 
> http://www.polyvore.com/maya_graduation/set?id=186979869


	3. Chapter 2

**.**

**Chapter 2**

**_“And when you speak angels speak from above, everyday words seem to turn into love songs. Give your heart and soul to me and life will always be la vie en rose.”_ **

**La Vie En Rose, Louis Armstrong_**

The next day, Maya went to help Riley pack for her trip to Paris. The brunette girl was a bundle of excitement as she whirled around the room _not_ packing and singing “La Vie En Rose” with Edith Piaf in very bad French, it came out more like gibberish.

Maya shook her head and laughed while she folded Riley’s linen shorts before placing them in her oversized suitcase.

“Argh, I can’t believe I’m leaving for _Pa-ree_ in the morning!” Riley squealed. “Mayaaaaaaa!”

“You won’t be going anywhere if you don’t start packing,” Maya answered.

“Paris with Lucas,” Riley sighed dreamily.

“And his parents,” Maya reminded her, holding up a black and floral tea dress. “Take or leave?”

Riley nodded. “ _Definitely_ take! So, what are you doing this summer? You and Josh got any exciting plans?”

“Riley, you know what I’m doing this summer. I’m mostly spending time with my siblings while Esperanza puts the finishing touches on her jewelry collection. When I’m not with them, I’ll be helping my mom and Shawn prepare for Baby Hunter.”

“But Josh will be there,” Riley sing-songed.

“Yes,” Maya conceded. “Josh will be there some of the time.”

“Don’t forget my metallic Jimmy Choos!” Riley said. “They go with the dress that you just packed.”

“Get them yourself!”  Maya replied. “I’m only here to keep you company and look, I’ve done most of your packing already.”

“Do you like Josh?” Riley asked as she found the shoes in question and tucked them in between the already packed clothes.

“You know I do,” Maya answered.

“No! I mean do you _like like_ him?”

“Riley, I thought you didn’t want to be my niece. Besides, we’ve already been through this.”

“Oh right, _right_! The rule. Some rules are stupid, you know.”

“You sound like Ariel right now,” Maya told her. “She said the same exact thing to us last night.”

“Smart little sister,” Riley said, grinning. “I know I told you that I didn’t want you to be my aunt, but if you were both happy, I wouldn’t mind it so much.”

“Yeah, well, nothing’s happening between us. We’re just friends. Besides, I’m not even in college yet. I want to concentrate on my studies when I get there.”

“Maya Hart, wanting to concentrate on her _studies_!? I never thought I’d see the day.”

“I buckled down in high school.”

“No thanks to my _uncle_!”

“It isn’t going to happen!” Maya replied. “Geez Riley! Why are you being so persistent about it!?”

Riley looked around the room, ran over to the door and slammed it shut, then lowered her voice. “I’ve seen the way he looks at you when you’re not looking. That rule you both made? He’s definitely broken it.”

Maya rolled her eyes and held up Riley’s Audrey Hepburn t-shirt. “He would _never_.”

“Yeah, I’m definitely bringing the t-shirt,” Riley answered, before sighing. “Well, you never know. . . he could have broken that rule. I don’t remember the last time he had a date that wasn’t _you_.”

Maya rolled her eyes again. “Well, that isn’t _my_ fault. I never said he wasn’t free to date or fall in love with other people. I just said _I_ was off-limits.”

Riley scrunched up her nose at her. “Well, the heart wants what the heart wants. Mark my words, Josh’s heart wants you!”

“Really, can’t we talk about _anything_ else!?”

“Are you going to miss me while I’m gone, Peaches?” Riley asked, giving Maya her goofiest smile.

“I can’t say that I am,” Maya teased. “But you’ll have to call me every day and tell me everything that you’re doing and all about the amazing foods you’re eating. I know Shawn gave you a new camera for graduation, so you better use it because I want visuals since I can’t be there with you.”

“I promise,” Riley answered.

“Summer will be over before you know it,” Maya said.

“Hey! I’m going to miss you but I don’t want summer to be over too soon. Do you know how long I’ve been waiting to go to Paris with Lucas?"

“Yeah, yeah. Ever since 7th grade,” Maya replied. “I know!”

Riley squealed again and fell on her bed, giggling like a little girl on Christmas Eve. “I’m so excited! I don’t know how I’m going to get anything done between now and tomorrow morning!”

“Apparently, that’s what I’m here for,” Maya answered.

There was a knock on the door and Riley sat up quickly, smoothing out her hair. “Come in!”

The door opened and Josh poked his head in the room. “Ah, I thought I’d find you in here Maya.”

“And what am I!?” Riley demanded in a joking tone. “Chopped liver!?”

“Of course not,” Josh soothed. “But I don’t think you’d be interested in tickets to see Daniela Andrade tonight.”

“Oh, one of your boring Youtube singers. Nope! You’re right, that _is_ more of _Maya’s_ thing!”

“So, what do you say? Is it a date?” Josh asked. “I mean, you know, is it one of our typical Sunday night _friendship_ dates?”

Behind him Riley rolled her eyes and made a gagging face before she caught Maya looking at her, she beamed. “I hope you two have _so_ much fun!” she said. “Hey, Maya do you know where my faux mink shawl is? I think it would look super cute with the dress.”

“Um, I think it’s still in that hatbox on the top shelf of your closet,” Maya answered, smiling at Josh. “Hey, I’m really busy here. I’ll see you later, okay? I am _so_ excited for the concert tonight!”

“Dinner first?” Josh asked as he backed out of the room.

“Of course! Just like always!” Maya replied looking pointedly at Riley, who was searching through hat boxes for her fake fur that she’d spent a whole two month’s allowance on at _Demolition_.

“Mmmh? Did you say something?” Riley asked.

“Never mind,” Maya said. “I’ll see you later Josh.”

“See you later Uncle Josh!” Riley echoed, flinging a hatbox open and clapping her hands together in glee. “Ah! There you are!”

“Riles, I don’t think there’ll be enough room in your suitcase for that,” Maya told her.

“I’m bringing the mink!” Riley retorted, clutching it to her chest protectively. “We’ll _make_ it fit!”

“Okay, fine!” Maya agreed. “Hey, do you mind if I leave a little early? I want to have time to get changed to go out with Josh.”

Riley smiled slyly. “Oh, I don’t mind! Leave as early as you’d like. In fact, leave _now_!”

“I’m good, thank you,” Maya said.

On this day of all days, Riley was not easily disappointed. One of her dreams were finally coming true, it would take a lot to burst her bubble. She just giggled and pressed the repeat button on her iPod and kept on with her packing while she continued to sing “La Vie En Rose” in butchered French.

**.**

“What a fantastic concert!” Maya said as she skipped alongside Josh, her ears still filled with music and her taxicab yellow pumps in her left hand. “Thank you for inviting me to go with you.”

“I had a good time too,” Josh answered, his eyes filled with love while he held onto her wrist and tapped out a melody on her pulse point, spelled out lyrics on her arm but Maya was oblivious to it.

“She’s even better live and in person,” Maya gushed. “What an experience!”

Josh grinned at her. “I’m glad you liked it. Maya. . .”

“Yeah?”

He stopped walking and turned to look at her. “You looked so beautiful tonight.”

Maya laughed. “Oh? Is that all?”

“Yeah. I just thought you should know because I hardly tell you enough as it is.”

“Oh Josh. . . you don’t have to tell me that. Our relationship. . . you know it isn’t about _that_.”

Josh reached out to touch her face and then dropped his hand to his side. “I know.”

Maya started to walk again. “Come on. I want ice cream and you’re paying!”

“You are not a cheap date, Maya Hart!” Josh teased her, his sudden surge of seriousness was gone as quickly as it had appeared.

“You’ve always known that about me!” Maya replied, winding her arm through his. “We’ve been doing this for how long now? Five years? Since when have I ever been a cheap date?”

“Point taken,” Josh answered. “Come on, I’ll get you your ice cream.”

“Thanks Josh! You seriously are _amazing_!”

“Don’t I know it?” Josh muttered.

“Huh?”

“Never mind,” Josh said. “Are you going back to Riley’s tonight? Since she’s leaving in the morning.”

“Yeah. She demanded my presence for a sleepover since we’re going to be apart most of the summer and then when she gets home, she’s preparing to head off to Princeton. Everything’s changing, Josh.”

“Yeah it is,” Josh agreed.

“It’s a good thing we’ll never change,” Maya said, resting her head on his shoulder. “Promise me that we’ll never change, Josh.”

“I promise,” Josh whispered, regretting it almost as soon as he had uttered the words because he didn’t want to stay stuck in the same holding pattern as always but he didn’t want to lose her either.

All those years ago, when he had promised that he wouldn’t fall in love with her, he had meant it. God knew that he had tried to fight loving her but it had been a battle that he had lost graciously after a time.

Now he needed to tell her because it was eating him up inside. He just wasn’t sure of how she would react, her with her _let’s stay the same forever’s_ and _just friends_. He knew it probably wouldn’t end well.

But it wasn’t going to stop him from speaking out. When he worked up the nerve to do it that was.

**TBC. . .**

**.**

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Everybody obviously knows where this is going. Right? But of course this is the point of the story and I like the idea of Josh being in love first (the second time). I haven’t explored the idea before and I am excited to do so now. I hope you’ll stick with me.
> 
> I have a one-shot planned in this verse with Riley and Lucas in Paris. But of course that won’t happen for a few more chapters because a key part of this story plays a part in that one. 
> 
> PSA: If you haven’t listened to Daniela Andrade, do us both a favor and go listen. You’ll be stunned and fall in love and her music plays a vital part in this story too. 
> 
> Anyhoo. No update next week because as you know, I’ll be out of town. Maybe I’ll post the day before I leave. We’ll have to see though.
> 
> Until Next Time!


	4. Chapter 4

**.**

**Chapter 4**

**_“You’ve always been my best friend. But now it’s more. I see you as more than that.”_ **

**_The Summer I Turned Pretty, Jenny Han__ **

One time, when the friendship had still been a little new, Josh had come over to her apartment with a record player that he had purchased at a thrift store. It had been summertime and Maya had taken him out to the roof, they had lay out on Mexican blankets that Shawn had brought back from a trip he’d taken to Santa Fe for his website.

They’d watched the stars and drank iced vanilla rooibos tea and listened to doo-wop records. They hadn’t talked at all but it was a comfortable kind of silence, the kind that took years to cultivate.

As summers started to pass, starry nights on the rooftop became one of their traditions.

Tonight was no exception. They were spread out on the same blankets, Maya was on her belly, in a vintage white sun dress that Esperanza had found for her at an outdoor market in Greece.

They were both barefoot and listening to _Hamilton_ on vinyl, half-finished glasses of strong decaf iced coffee was by their elbows. Josh was on his back, searching out Cassiopeia while she sang random verses from “It’s Quiet Uptown”.

_“Have pity, they are going through the unimaginable. . .”_

Josh turned over on his own stomach and smiled at her. “Hey.”

“Hey,” Maya echoed, smiling sleepily at him, content in the warmth of the evening.

“So. . .”

“So. . .”

“Stop copying me,” Josh said jokingly but Maya could tell there was something on his mind because it was half-heartedly.

Maya tugged gently at her wood carved tusk necklace and looked at him with concern in her blue eyes. “Is everything okay?”

“Fine.”

“Come on, talk to me!” Maya prodded. “We’ve always been able to talk.”

“Yeah. Not about this,” Josh replied.

Maya frowned at him. “Is it a girl?”

Josh frowned back at her. “What makes you think it’s a _girl_?”

“I’m just guessing. Besides, I know you pretty much better than I know anyone else. Aside from Riley.”

Josh sighed. “If you did then you’d be able to tell. Or maybe I’m just better at concealing it then I thought.”

Maya frowned. “What are you talking about?”

“Everyone’s right.”

“About?”

“Me. You. How I feel about you. I love you.”

“You love _me_?” Maya repeated. “Like a friend? Like the way I love you? _Right_?”

“So much more than that,” Josh answered, leaning in and giving her a kiss.

Maya pulled away and shook her head. “No. _No!_ You _promised_ Josh!”

Josh looked at her sadly. “I know. I didn’t mean to. It just sort of happened. I’m sorry.”

Maya got to her feet and wrapped her kimono around her tightly, like she was trying to protect himself. She looked at him in disbelief. “How?”

“How what? How did it happen?” Josh asked, stumbling to his own feet. “How did I fall in love with you? I told you, I have no idea! Maybe it was destined to happen. Maybe we weren’t meant to be _just_ friends.”

“Maybe we weren’t meant to be anything at all!” Maya answered. “Did you ever think about that when you were falling in love with me?”

“I’m not like Lucas, I’m not going to choose somebody else!” Josh said.

Maya backed away. “It isn’t that!”

“Then what is it?”

“I-I-I don’t know! All I know is you shouldn’t love me. You _can’t_ love me!”

“Too late! I already do! Maybe I’ve loved you since I’ve known you and I just started to realize it.”

“Don’t say things like that!” Maya begged. _“Please. . .”_

“Okay. I won’t,” Josh said. “I’ve gotta go, I have work in the morning. I’ll see you around Maya.”

Maya put her sandals on and followed him down the stairs and out of the apartment building. “Josh! Josh! Don’t leave like this!”

Josh whirled around to look at her. “How do you want me to leave?”

“I don’t know. . . not like _this_! Not when you’re so angry at me.”

“I’m not angry at you,” Josh told her. “I’m only angry at myself. You’ve been saying it this whole time and I was stupid enough to ignore it. To think you could care for me like I cared about you.”

“Josh. . .”

“I wish I hadn’t been so stupid,” Josh muttered. “I wish I had dated other girls and just let you be my friend. Not the most important woman in my life! I really have to go now.”

“Your stuff. . .”

Josh shook his head. “I’ll get it later.”

“Okay. . .”

Maya watched him disappear across the street, stunned by the turn of events. As of the other day, things had been going so well for them. He’d even promised that nothing would change between them.

She felt a surge of anger rush through her. He’d been planning on changing things _this_ whole time! Confessing his feelings for her had been a breach of their promise.

She turned around and stomped back to her apartment, she slammed the door behind her.

“Maya, honey what’s the matter?” Katy asked, coming out of the kitchen and wiping her hands on a dish towel.

“Nothing,” Maya lied. “Nothing at all.”

“Where’s Josh?”

“He had to go,” Maya answered.

“What happened?” Shawn asked, joining them with a glossy new copy of _National Geographic_ in his hand.

Maya released a deep breath and tightened her kimono around her, like she was trying to shield herself from what had just happened between her and Josh.

“Sweetie? Did something happen between you and Josh?” Katy prodded.

“He just had to go and ruin everything!” Maya blurted.

“Oh boy!” Shawn said, his face breaking out into a wide grin.

 _“Oh boy?”_ Katy repeated, glancing at her husband. “Shawn, I think you better tell me what happened since our daughter here is being so tight-lipped.”

“Our boy Josh _finally_ dropped the ‘L-bomb’ tonight,” Shawn explained.

“The ‘L-bomb’? Shawn what are you trying to say?”

“Josh told me that he’s in love with me!” Maya answered.

“Well! _Finally!_ ” Katy said.

 _“Finally!”_ Maya answered. “ _Finally!?_ He _promised_ he wouldn’t! Somebody should have warned me!”

“We did warn you sugar,” Katy replied. “I can’t tell you how many times I told you I thought he liked you and I’ve overheard Riley tell you more than once that she thought you guys were going to be a couple.”

“You know what, I don’t have time for this right now!”

Katy smirked. “Oh, do you have somewhere you need to be at 10pm at night?”

“No. I have to babysit in the morning.”

“How early is Esperanza expecting you?” Katy asked, still teasing. “At 4am?”

“No! Mom, _please_ I don’t want to talk about it!”

“Talk about what? Were we talking about anything particular?” Katy asked, eyeing Shawn.

Maya groaned. “This is the first time somebody’s told me that they’ve loved me and we’re turning it into a joke!”

“But you don’t care that he loves you, right?” Shawn asked.

Maya sighed. “I care! But mostly I care that he ruined the friendship!”

“Did he? Did he ruin the friendship, Maya?” Katy asked. “You can’t fault the boy for being honest. Friends are honest with each other.”

“He broke the only rule in our friendship!”

“First of all, it’s _stupid_ to have rules for your friends. Second of all, rules are meant to be broken!” Shawn told her, he caught his wife’s look and cleared his throat. “Well. . . sometimes. Maya, what were you thinking make a rule like that anyways?”

“I didn’t want to get my heart broken again!” Maya answered. “And for the first time, I did a good job keeping rules! But I-I wish I hadn’t ever become his friend!”

“Oh sweetie, you don’t mean that!” Katy chided. “You two have had a pretty good few years together. You wouldn’t trade all those days so you could have a minute of peace. Would you?”

Maya breathed in and breathed out, closed her eyes and shook her head. “I don’t know. I really don’t. . . I have to go. He left his stuff up on the roof, I better bring it in just in case it rains tonight.”

Shawn glanced at Katy. “I’m going to call Cory and see if Josh is okay. He’s supposed to be staying with them this weekend.”

Katy nodded and watched her daughter disappear.  She would do anything to bring Josh and Maya back together, to make them even stronger than they already were.

But this wasn’t something anybody could fix.

Maya was going to have to come to her own conclusions. Katy was sure her daughter wouldn’t be able to live in a world without Josh in it and that she’d even realize that she loved him too.

**.**

Maya tossed and turned and didn’t sleep a wink. She was up even before her alarm went off. Her anger from the night before had evaporated, she just felt hollow. Empty.

There weren’t any morning tweets or texts from him and she guessed she had forfeited her right to those kinds of messages with her rejection the night before.

She pulled on a navy blue shift dress, slipped her feet into her sandals from the night before and wrote a note for her mother and Shawn. Then she left the apartment building, shuffling along the streets of New York.

She stopped to get coffee for her and Esperanza.

Her stepmother was surprised but not unhappy to see her so early in the morning.

“I wasn’t expecting you for another two hours!” Esperanza said as she let Maya in. “Is everything okay? Your mom and the baby are alright, right?”

“They’re fine,” Maya answered, handing Esperanza her usual iced espresso and closing the door behind her.

“Then what’s wrong?”

“What makes you think there’s wrong?” Maya asked.

“You look like you’ve got the weight of the world on your shoulders,” Esperanza answered, sitting down on her couch Indian-style, her white shirt dress just skimming the tops of her slim thighs. _“Spill!”_

Maya sat down. “Josh loves me.”

Esperanza nodded and stirred her espresso in with her milk. “I know. What’s so wrong with that?”

“I don’t love him back.”

Esperanza raised a perfectly arched eyebrow. “You don’t? Are you so sure about that?”

“I was happy just being friends with him,” Maya answered. “Now I don’t know what I’m going to do. I know I don’t want to run into him for a while. I wouldn’t know what to do. . . or what to say.”

“You could come with us to North Carolina,” Esperanza suggested. “It might give you time to figure out what you want, give you some space. If you stay here, you’re just going to see Josh everywhere you go. Even if he isn’t there. Yes! This is a perfect idea! I’ll call your mother when I get to the office and clear it with her."

Maya shook her head. “I couldn’t go with you. It’s your family vacation.” 

Esperanza laughed and shook her head. “Silly girl, you are _family_! You know that! I don’t know why I didn’t think to ask you to come before. Well, I guess it was because I thought you and Joshua were going to spend the summer together.” 

“Yeah. Look how that turned out.” 

“Oh come on. Don’t be too tough on him, it’s easy to see why he would fall in love with you,” Esperanza said. 

“He wasn’t supposed to though.”

“Maya, my darling, you hold the people in your life to impossible standards,” Esperanza told her. 

“No I don’t!” Maya protested even though she knew it was true.

She _did_ have a tendency to hold the people in her life to _impossible_ standards. Her father, her mother, Lucas, Riley. . . Josh. Even Farkle, who had only had everybody’s best interests at heart, had been held to her ‘impossible standards’.

But she wasn’t going to admit it. Not out loud, not to herself. . . not to _anyone_. Because when they didn’t live up to her standards, it was easy to let them go.

 **TBC. . .**  

**.**

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, some of this chapter *might* have been inspired by the episode in Green Gables Fables where Gilbert told Anne that he loved her and she rejected him. If you don’t want your heart to be ripped out then don’t watch it. Anne of Green Gables is definitely the original YA fiction. I’d recommend the first 3 books though, the 4th one bored me to tears. Also, I just finished the first 2 books in the summer trilogy by Jenny Han. SO good. I’m not going to read the third one because I know I won’t love it as much as the first 2.
> 
> Next up is the trip to NC and a couple of one-shots. Josh’s reaction to Maya’s rejection and Riley/Lucas in Paris worrying about Josh/Maya. Hope you’ll stick around. In the meantime, please tell me what you thought of this.
> 
> Until Next Time!


	5. Chapter 5

**.**

**Chapter 5**

**_“My judgement’s clouded, like tonight’s sky.”_ **

**Moments, One Direction**

**_“Those you’ve pained may carry that still with them. All the same, they whisper all forgiven. Still, your heart says the shadows bring the starlight and everything you’ve ever been is still there in the dark night.”_ **

**Those You’ve Known, Spring Awakening**

**_“God knows it’s easy to run, easy to run from the people you love.”_ **

**I’d Give It All For You, Songs For A New World**

**_“We disappoint, we leave a mess. We die but we don’t. We disappoint in turn I guess. Forget, though we won’t.”_ **

**No More, Into the Woods**

“You need to talk to Josh before you go,” Katy said.

“We’re leaving in an hour,” Maya replied. “I don’t have the time.”

“We could stop by the airport. It’s on the way to the airport,” Esperanza told her, sharing a look with Katy. “Your mother’s right, you can’t leave things like this. Anything could happen and then you’ll live life with so many unsaid things between you and Joshua.”

“I don’t have anything to say to him,” Maya answered firmly. “He broke his promise to me. He broke our one rule!”

“Do you even know why you made that rule, Maya?” Katy asked. “Does it still make sense to you?”

“I. . . it-it had something to do with Riley and Lucas!” Maya said, lifting up her suitcase and carry-on bag.

“Honey, I know that hurt you but it’s so far in the past I don’t see what it has to do with anything!” Katy protested. “Josh isn’t Lucas. He isn’t in love with somebody else. He loves _you_!”

“He might change his mind though!”

Katy turned to Esperanza and shook her head. “I give up, _you_ can deal with her! Good luck!”

“I’m sure she’ll see reason soon,” Esperanza answered.

“Hello? I’m still in the room!” Maya announced. “And I won’t be seeing reason! There isn’t any reason to see!”

“I’ve got this,” Esperanza assured Katy.

“I hope so,” Katy murmured.

“Still here!” Maya told them.

“It isn’t like we’re trying to keep secrets from you Maya!” Esperanza told her. “We’re just not going to tell you anything because suggestion can be very powerful. You can draw your own conclusions my darling.

Maya eyed her mother and stepmother suspiciously. “Josh isn’t going to show up in North Carolina or anything like that, is he?”

“He most certainly is not!” Esperanza assured her.

“You should tell him that you’re leaving though. Just in case he comes around to see you.”

“Some time away from each other will be a good thing,” Maya answered, giving her mom a goodbye kiss before bending down to instruct the baby not to arrive before she got home from the beach.

She didn’t give Josh a second thought.

But she did.

**.**

She wrote him a letter on the plane, trying to explain her point of view and why she did what she had done. But it didn’t come out the way she wanted it to. She folded it into fourths and stuck it in the back of her sketchbook where she could forget about it.

She looked up and saw Ariel staring at her.

“What?” Maya asked, suddenly self-conscious.

“Why isn’t Josh coming with us?”

“Work,” Maya answered, it wasn’t all a lie.

“It’s a _family_ trip,” Esperanza added, reaching across the airplane aisle to ruffle Ariel’s hair. “I’m sure you’ll see Joshua when we get home though.”

Maya shook her head. “Don’t make promises you can’t keep, Esperanza.” She sighed when she saw the looks on both Eddie and Ariel’s face. “I’m sure Josh’ll come and see you when we get home.”

“He’ll see you too, won’t he?” Eddie asked anxiously, he was always the most attune to his half-sister’s moods. “You two aren’t fighting, right?” 

Maya shook her head. “No. Of course not! What would Josh and I have to fight about silly?”

“I think. . .”

  
“Ariel!” Kermit said, shaking his head. “Leave Maya alone, sweetie. Her and Josh are _fine_. He’s not going anywhere, I’m sure of it.”

Ariel shut her mouth and frowned. “Well, I wish he’d come with us,” she said after a beat. “Do you think you could text him or something and see if he’ll come?”

“He has to work all week,” Maya answered even though she wasn’t sure what his schedule for work looked like.

“I know something happened!” Ariel accused. “Why won’t anybody tell me!?”

“Ariel, what have I told you about making a scene?” Esperanza asked. “Nothing’s going on, darling! Maya and Josh don’t need to spend every waking minute together. They’d probably like each other less if they did that.”

Maya put on her headphones and drowned her family out with the push of a button. There was no way she’d be able to explain what had happened to Ariel and she couldn’t bear Esperanza’s hopefulness that she’d realize she was in love with Josh at the end of the week.

When she opened her eyes again, they were getting ready to touchdown in Charlotte and Esperanza was shaking her awake and telling her it was time to put her seatbelt on.

Maya nodded and shut off Alexi Murdoch half-song. She wrapped the cord around her iPod tightly and tried to forget what she had dreamed about. Her subconscious had betrayed her, painting pictures that she’d rather not think about, giving her images that she’d rather not entertain.

Making her think about things she’d been trying to run away from since she was 16.

She rubbed her eyes, buckled up and banished Josh from her mind.

But he wouldn’t budge and as they landed in North Carolina all she could think about was the dreams she had where Josh told her that he loved her and she loved him back and she didn’t run away like a scared little girl.

 **.**  

North Carolina was humid, it felt like a wet blanket had wrapped itself around Maya and there was no escaping it. She pulled her hair off her neck and fanned herself with her free hand.

They still had a ways to go before they got to their vacation home on Sunset Beach. Maya wasn’t going to be able to sit for 3 hours plus who knew how many minutes in her jeans, so she grabbed her suitcase and ducked into a bathroom to get changed. 

20 minutes later, they had stopped at a place called Chick Fil A for lunch and were on the highway, Kermit had Elvis blasting from the stereo and he and Esperanza were singing along with the King at the top of their lungs while Ariel complained that their father hadn’t chosen One Direction as their driving music.

For a second, Maya tried to cheer her sister up but Ariel was in an even worse mood than she was with the absence of Harry, Louis, Liam, Niall _and_ Josh in her life.

So, she gave up and stared out the window at the scenery flying by her. She was far away from home and she felt even heavier than she had when Josh had told her that he loved her and she hadn’t said it back.

 

**TBC. . .**

 

**.**

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A short chapter this time. I apologize. But I felt like I was starting to repeat myself and I didn’t know what else to write. But I know what track I’m on. I hope you’ll stay tuned for the rest of the story and that you’ll tell me what you thought of this chapter. I’m looking forward to your thoughts!
> 
> YA novel update, “Recovery Road” by Blake Nelson. A good but bittersweet read. I’d recommend it and the Freeform (ABC Family) show too. Although there are some plot differences.
> 
> I am planning on stopping posting in Ao3 because it isn't getting the same response as it is over on FFN. If you like this please at least give me kudos.
> 
> Until Next Time!


	6. Chapter 6

**.**

**Chapter 6**

**_“Maybe we got lost in translation, maybe I asked for too much.”_ **

**All Too Well, Taylor Swift**

**_“I am in pieces.”_ **

**All the Bright Places, Jennifer Niven**

Maya woke up forgetting where she was and what was going on in her life for one glorious second and then it all came crashing back like a wave on the beach. She was on vacation in North Carolina and one of her best friends was in love with her.

She lay in bed and wished that if she wished hard enough, she would be able to forget that Josh loved her. Or maybe he would forget about it even before she did and things could go back to normal.

She wished she could stop thinking about it that way.

After a few more minutes of trying to go back to sleep, she finally decided to get out of bed.

Esperanza was already awake and doing yoga when Maya went outside.

“I sent Kermit out to get coffee,” Esperanza said, stretching into downward dog. “It was the only thing the people we’re renting the vacation home from didn’t provide. And I’m sure you need a caffeine buzz after sleeping in the same room as Ariel and Eddie.”

“They were fine,” Maya assured her. “If I didn’t sleep it’s all on me.”

“Still thinking about Josh?” Esperanza asked.

Maya pushed her hair behind her ears. “No.”

“Mmmmh,” Esperanza murmured as she came back into an upright position. “Okay.”

“Just okay?”

“I’ll take your word for it,” Esperanza replied. “This week isn’t about me or your dad or anybody trying to push Josh on you. This week is about you discovering your own heart.”

Maya wasn’t going to tell her that she’d already done some self-discovering and she didn’t like what she had found out. Instead, she smiled at Esperanza and shrugged. “I’m not sure there’s anything to find out,” she said.

“Oh come on Maya,” Esperanza said, flopping down on the couch beside her. “You can’t really feel that way. . .”

“I do,” Maya lied.

“Okay,” Esperanza relented.

The door opened and Kermit came in with the coffee they so desperately needed. Esperanza jumped up to relieve him of the paper bag and go make coffee for the three of them.

Kermit looked like he wanted to say something but he had the better sense not to and Maya was glad. She was sick of everybody talking.

But Kermit knew better. He was still struggling to earn his right as her father, he never interfered even when there were times he probably should have.

“You want to say something, don’t you?” Maya asked. “Everybody else has. Except for you.”

“I’ve got nothing to say,” Kermit replied. “Nothing you haven’t already heard before, anyways.”

Maya sighed and ran her fingers through her hair. “Dad.”

“Maya, listen to me, I like him. I like him a lot. If it weren’t for him, I don’t think we’d be having this conversation right now. But I love you and I want you to do what makes you happy. Even if it means you’re happy without Josh.”

She sighed again. “Dad, I’m not happy. . . without Josh. . ." 

It was surprising how freeing it felt to say _that_ aloud. She cleared her throat and waited for her father to say something. . . to say _anything_.

“Coffee’s ready!” Esperanza called from the kitchen before he could.

“Come on kiddo,” Kermit said, putting his arm around her. “Let’s go and get some coffee. Everything will make more sense with caffeine in your system.”

“Okay.”

**.**

They went to the beach later that day. Kermit kept the kids busy building sandcastles while Esperanza sketched out ideas for a new beach-inspired jewelry line and Maya tried to read _the Little Prince_ but kept losing her place. She finally gave up on it, tossing it aside and glancing over her stepmother’s shoulder to get a glimpse of what she was working on.

“What do you think of shell pendants with enamel paintings of the ocean on them?” Esperanza asked, nudging her leather sketchbook over to Maya so she could take a closer peek.

“I like it,” Maya said, thankful for the distraction from her traitorous thoughts about Josh showing up in North Carolina and making a grander declaration of love. “I like the lobster and seahorse bracelets.”

“Aren’t they inspired though?” Esperanza asked. “I could totally see the Maratha Vineyard and Nantucket and Hamptons set buying these before they went away for the summer.”

Maya nodded. Esperanza definitely had a knack for pinpointing potential buyers. “It’s a good idea,” she agreed. “It’s why you’re one of the best in your field.”

Esperanza blushed and then cleared her throat. “Maybe you should go back to the house and try to take a nap. You look exhausted.”

“This isn’t some sort of trick, is it?” Maya asked, suddenly suspicious.

“No trick,” Esperanza promised. “Josh isn’t going to be waiting on the porch, if that’s what you think. I genuinely think you need to get some rest. Have you slept since before. . .?”

“No. . .” Maya admitted.

“Go on then. I’ll keep everybody here for another hour. You go take a power nap. When we get back, we’ll go and get lunch."

**.**

When Maya got back to their little rental by the beach, she realized it was the first time she had been alone since Josh had told her that he loved her. She had been furious with him for breaking their promise. She had thought she carried that anger with her all the way to North Carolina. But since she was all alone, in a house void of all noise except the roaring ocean and a whirring fan, she realized that she was just sad without him. 

It was so overwhelming. She sat on the edge of her bed and buried her face in her hands and started to cry.

She was surprised by how therapeutic it felt.

It was a release. 

Maya so desperately needed a release.

Eventually, she drifted off to sleep and once again dreamed dreams where she and Josh were more than just friends and she was okay with that.

 

**TBC. .**

**.**

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A short chapter, I know. I’m sorry but I have only a little inspiration for this story even though I know the direction this story is going. Is that any consolation? I hope you’ll tell me your thoughts on this chapter. I’ll see you next week!
> 
> Until Next Time!


	7. Chapter 7

** **

 

**.**

**Chapter 7**  

**_“I want to mend this heart before I quit believing.”_ **

**First Loves, Paul McDonald**

“Maya!” Ariel bounced on their bed. “We’re going to get lunch! But Mommy says you can stay here if you want to.”

Maya opened one eye and looked at her half-sister. “It’s okay. I’ll go with you guys.”

“Are you okay?” Ariel asked. “You look sadder than you did before.”

“I’m just tired,” Maya answered, sitting up and rubbing the sleep out of her eyes.

“Okay. You better get dressed!” Ariel said.

Maya remembered she was still in her bathing suit. “Okay. I’ll get dressed and be right there.”

Ariel took this as her cue to leave the room. Maya tripped over her carry-on bag when she was going to her suitcase. All the contents went spilling out of it. She sighed in exasperation with herself and knelt down to pick up the books and sketchpads. 

She stopped short when she saw _Pride & Prejudice_ among the things her mother had packed to keep her occupied. It seemed like a lifetime since Josh had given it to her on their walk home.

  
He had told her then he had something to say. Or maybe he had said he had something to show her. . .

Maya picked the book up and paged through it, wondering what it was exactly that Josh had wanted to show her in a book that was older than the both of them put together.

She knew the story of Mr. Darcy and Elizabeth Bennett well enough, Riley had made her sit through the six hour version during many sleepovers and one summer, she and Josh had taken turns reading the book aloud to each other.

But it didn’t have any significance outside of that. . .

Until her eyes landed on words underlined in black ink with a note scrawled in Josh’s handwriting.

She read the words to herself. They came out in whispered gasps. _“I cannot fix the hour, or the spot, or the look, or the words, which laid the foundation. It is too long ago. I was in the middle before I knew I had begun.”_

Maya realized her hands were shaking. The world around her felt ice cold even though it was in the low 90s. She stared at the page, and traced her fingers over Josh’s note and her eyes filled with tears again.

She picked herself up off the floor and clutched the book to her chest. She went to her suitcase and pulled out a sweatshirt and denim shorts. She wasn’t going to be going anywhere.

She couldn’t.

She threw on her clothes and wrapped herself in sheets and held the book close to her chest.

Esperanza poked her head in after a turn. “Sweetie, are you coming to get lunch with us?”

“I’m not really hungry right now,” Maya answered, not opening her eyes.

“Okay. Call me if you want us to bring you something back.”

“I will,” Maya promised.

A few minutes later, the door opened again and Kermit came in. He sat down on the bed and put his hand on Maya’s shoulder. “Sweetie, we need to talk.”

Maya sighed, “Are you going to finally tell me what everybody’s already been telling me?”

“No. Not really,” Kermit answered.

Maya turned over on her back and looked up at him. “What is it daddy?”

“This isn’t about not loving Josh,” Kermit told her. “Because I think you do.”

“You do?” Maya asked.

“I know you do,” Kermit answered. “But deep down you’re scared to be in love, to be loved in return. I’m afraid it’s _my_ fault. . .”

“Your fault?” Maya repeated, frowning. “What do you mean that this is your fault?”

“You have to let me finish this,” Kermit said. “Yes, it’s _my_ fault. I was the only man in your life and I shrieked my responsibility by leaving you the way I did. If I had stayed like I should have, maybe you wouldn’t be like this.”

“Like _what_!?”

“Scared that everybody you let in was going to leave you,” Kermit replied. “But Josh sure as hell isn’t _me_. Not everybody you love is going to leave you. They’d be foolish to do something like that. He hasn’t left you so far. Has he?”

“No,” Maya admitted, her voice small and foreign.

“And you know not everybody you fall in love with is going to choose somebody else,” Kermit said.

“I was never really _in love_ with Lucas ever,” Maya answered quietly. “Even that. . . it leads back to Josh not being around for a while and. . .” she trailed off and sighed.

“You could always go home,” Kermit suggested tentatively. “You’re miserable here, I can tell.”

“It isn’t any of you guys." 

Kermit smiled. “I know.” 

“Would you mind if I went home?” Maya asked.

Kermit shook his head. “Nope. In fact, I already purchased your ticket. You’re leaving tonight.”

“That was very presumptuous of you.”

Kermit shrugged. “Everybody talked about the way Josh looks at you. But I saw the way you looked at him. Even if you didn’t know it.”

Maya made a face. “Dad!!!! I didn’t look at him in a way! At all! We were just friends.”

“You keep telling yourself _that_ ,” Kermit answered, tugging her out of bed. “Come and eat with us and then we’ll take you to the airport.”

“But my stuff. . .”

“Bring it now,” Kermit said. “Or better yet, only bring the things you need and we’ll make sure you get your suitcase when we come home next week.”

“Are you sure?” Maya checked.

“Of course we are,” Esperanza said, coming into the room and sorting through Maya’s books, before putting them all back in her travel bag. “Now we’ve called your mother and Shawn. They’ll be there to meet you at the airport tonight.”

“But you guys knew the whole time. . . didn’t you?”

“That’s what your mother and I have been trying to tell you this whole time,” Esperanza answered, smiling at her and coming over to give her a hug.

Maya closed her eyes and hugged her back. “I do love him.”

“I know,” Esperanza said. “Now go and tell _him_.”

**TBC. . .**

**.**

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I’ve had this chapter planned from the beginning. Kermit telling her that everybody isn’t like him and going to leave her. I kind of could see it happening in the future, if he ever comes back and Maya forgives him.
> 
> Anyways. . . I’ll see you next Friday!
> 
> Until Next Time!


	9. Chapter 9

 

“There you are Maya! Thank goodness!” Esperanza said flinging the door open. “I was so worried something had happened to you on the way over here!”

“Nothing interesting,” Maya reassured her, kicking off her Converse sneakers and joining her stepmother in the living room. 

Esperanza sat down on the couch and put on a pair of gladiator sandals. “Josh didn’t come with you this afternoon?” she asked.

“Not today,” Maya answered. 

“I’m surprised. The two of you are usually joined at the hip.”

“He had to work at the bookstore,” Maya said. “Besides, I’m sure he doesn’t want to sit around an apartment all day helping me watching kids if he doesn’t have to.”

  
Esperanza smiled and like always, Maya was reminded of the Pandora Jewelry model. 

“What are you smiling at?” Maya asked curiously. 

Esperanza tugged at her vintage Grecian dress and shook her head. “Nothing much. Just that you think Josh  _ minds _ sitting with you all day. Silly girl!”

“Oh come on, you do know we are only friends!”

“Friends can become something more,” Esperanza told her. “And it would be even better than meeting and deciding to date right out of the gate. My darling Maya, have you seen the way he looks at you?”

Maya stared at Esperanza opened mouthed as the woman gathered up her satchel and phone, leaving her statement in the air between them without expanding on it.

Maya swallowed. “He doesn’t look at me in anyway.”

Esperanza smiled a knowing smile and planted a red-lipped kiss on her cheek. “There’s money on the refrigerator for pizza. Kermit should be home around 7pm. I’ve told the kids to be on their best behavior for you. But don’t hesitate to call if they’re not. They’re taking naps right now. . . I hope. . .”

“I’ve got it all handled!” Maya said. “Go on now, I don’t want you to be late for your meeting!”

Esperanza kissed her again and then she was gone, leaving a cloud of  _ Fendi  _ in her wake. She’d been out of the house for all of five minutes when Maya heard Eddie calling for her.

“You’re supposed to be taking a nap,” Maya whispered.

“I can’t sleep!” Eddie whispered back. “Is Joshie here? Maybe he can read me a story like he usually does when I can’t sleep.”

“Sorry to disappoint you buddy but it’s just me today.”

Eddie frowned. “Why!?”

“Because Josh had to work,” Maya answered, going into his bedroom and crawling under the sheet with him. “It’s adult stuff, you’ll understand it when you’re older.”

Eddie snuggled in closer to her. “Well, I guess it’s okay that you’re the only one here.”

“Oh, good. I’m glad that you approve of my presence in your life.”

Eddie giggled. “You’re funny.”

“I’m glad you think so.”

“Where’s Josh!” Ariel demanded from the doorway, her hands on her hips. 

“He had to work!” Eddie answered. “It’s ‘dult stuff, Ari.”

“You said he’d come too!” Ariel accused.

“Not all the time,” Maya replied. “Come on Ari, be a good sport. Josh’ll come for a visit again. I promise.”

“You two will always be together?” Ariel asked.

“Yes,” Maya assured her. “And if we aren’t, I’m sure he’ll try and get joint custody of all four of you. He won’t give you up  _ that  _ easily, even if we give each other up.”

Ariel frowned. “Huh?”

“Never mind,” Maya said, patting the little space that was left beside her. “Come on, if you’re not going to sleep then you might as well get in on the cuddle session.”

Ariel ran and jumped in bed beside her. Maya put her arms around both of them and started to hum a little before she started to sing to them, lulling them to sleep. They were onto her because they fought it for a while, blinking and giggling before eventually giving in and drifting off on the lyrics of an old song.

When all four of her siblings had woken up, she gave them snacks while Ariel and Eddie argued about what to watch on Netflix. 

Maya settled it by doing a coin toss, heads they’d watch whatever American Girl movie that Ariel wanted to watch. Tales, they’d watch  _ Mighty Med.  _ Both Maya and Ariel were a little disappointed when the quarter landed on tails. 

But Maya wasn’t as vocal as Ariel was in her disappointment, she set up  _ Mighty Med _ and busied herself taking care of the twins while Ariel complained at Eddie the whole time.

Around 5pm, Maya ordered pizza for dinner and was pleasantly surprised when the doorbell rang and Josh was standing in the hallway with two boxes of pizza in his hand.

“What are you doing with my pizza?” She asked, grinning at him.

“I commandeered it from the delivery boy,” Josh answered. “It’s all paid for and everything.”

“You didn’t have to do that!” Maya protested. “Esperanza left money so I could pay for it.”

“I didn’t mind,” Josh replied. “There’s a catch though.”

“Of course there is!”

“You have to share some with me,” Josh said, holding it out of her reach. “Is it a deal?”

Maya rolled her eyes. “I couldn’t very well say no to you after you paid for it, now could I?”

“Nope! So, are you going to invite me in or not?”

“I’ll have to think about that. . .”

“Maya!? Is that Joshie!?” Ariel shouted from the living room.

“Maybe!” Maya called back.

“Oh come on, you have to let me in now that Ari knows I’m here!” Josh told her.

Maya sighed in fake exasperation. “Fine. I guess you better come in then. But first you better tell me what you’re really doing here.”

“I came to walk you home. Dinner is just a bonus,” Josh answered. 

“Oh, is it?” Maya asked. “If I didn’t know any better, I’d say you planned this.”

“Planned what? It isn’t like I’m getting a free meal here,” Josh replied as he walked through the door and was almost assaulted by Ariel. “Whoa! Watch it there sweetie pie, I wouldn’t want to drop pizza on your head!”

“Ooops! Sorry Joshie!” Ariel answered, giggling. “What are you doing here anyways? Maya said you had to work today.”

“I got off early and decided to pay a visit to my favorite girl,” Josh replied.

Ariel beamed.  _ “Me!?” _

Maya gave him a pointed look. 

Josh nodded. “Yes. . .  _ you _ and Maya.”

“What about Eddie, Winnie and Oliver?” Ariel asked, quickly running through the list. 

“I came to see them too,” Josh replied. “Is that the right answer, Maya?"

“That’s fine Josh,” Maya said, rolling her eyes. “Come on, let’s feed them before the food gets cold.”

“I’m right behind you,” Josh answered, following her into the dining room with Ariel close at his heels.

**.**

“Thank you for walking me home tonight,” Maya said. “I know that’s why you really came to see me tonight.”

“No problem,” Josh answered, grinning at her. “I thought after a long day of babysitting kids, you’d be in need of some older people conversation.”

“That’s for sure! If I had to watch another episode of  _ Mighty Med _ , I was going to poke my eyes out with a spoon!”

Josh poked her in the side. “That’s a very interesting visual, Hart.”

“I will come up with whatever visuals I want to, thank you very much!” Maya answered. “And don’t poke me, Matthews!”

“Oh! I just remembered! I’ve got something for you!” Josh said, flipping open his messenger bag and rummaging through it. “I stumbled across it while I was shelving books today.”

Maya took it. “ _ Pride & Prejudice _ ?”

“There’s something in it that I really want you to see. . .” Josh was saying when her phone started to ring.

“Hold on a sec Josh, it’s Riley. I’ve gotta take this! The time difference. . . you understand, right?”

“Go ahead,” Josh answered. 

“I’ll put her on speakerphone,” Maya said diplomatically. “Hi Riles, it’s Maya and Josh!”

“Ooooh!” Riley squealed. “Maya and  _ Josh _ !? Do you guys have something you want to tell me?”

“No!” Maya and Josh chorused together. 

“Maya had to babysit all day and I’m just walking her home,” Josh answered. “Anyways, how’s Paris treating you?”

“I  _ love _ it! You guys should really go some day! You know it would be a great place for a budding architect and artist to go. You two would be  _ so  _ inspired if you came here!"

“I have to graduate school and get a job before I can even think about traveling to foreign countries,” Josh told her, glancing at Maya and shaking his head.

“Yeah. But you can come  _ some  _ day!” Riley insisted. “Maybe I’ll just stay here and then you two can come and see me together.”

Josh chuckled. “I’m sure Cory will let you stay in Paris all by yourself!” 

Riley giggled. “Well. I really should go! It’s 2 in the morning here! Lucas and I still haven’t gone to bed yet.”

“You better go and get some sleep Peaches,” Maya said. “We’ll talk later.”

“Okay,” Riley agreed. “Goodnight Josh, Goodnight Maya!”

“Goodnight!” Josh and Maya chorused together which caused Riley to dissolve into another fit of giggles.

Maya put her phone away and tucked her arm through Josh’s. “Why Mr. Matthews, I do declare I’d be pleased as punch if you saw me the rest of the way home,” she teased with a slight southern lilt.

“And I’d be pleased to take you there, Miz Hart,” Josh replied with a distinguished southern accent of his own. 

“Maybe you’d like to stay on for some sweet afterwards?” Maya batted her eyelashes at him. “It’s decaf!”

Josh burst out laughing, breaking character. Maya smiled, thrilled by his reaction, she had always loved being able to make him laugh. 

“Come on Hart,” Josh said. “I’ll take you home and I’ll even stay for some of that decaf sweet tea.”

“I lied, I don’t have sweet tea at home. Decaf or otherwise,” Maya said. “But you’re still welcome to stay. If you’d like.”

“I’d like to. You know that,” Josh answered.

“Oh! What were you saying earlier. . . I mean about  _ Pride & Prejudice _ ?"

“Um. . . never mind,” Josh said. “It doesn’t matter right now. We’ll talk about it later. Okay?”

Maya frowned and then nodded. “Okay. Whatever you want Josh.”

“Be careful what you say Maya,” Josh warned her. “I just might take you up on it one day.”

“What do you mean?” Maya asked, suddenly anxious.

Josh shook his head. “Never mind. I don’t want to talk about it. Not right now anyways. I’ll tell you soon enough. I promise.”

“You better! We don’t usually keep secrets from each other!” Maya replied.

“That’s not going to change,” Josh answered.

“Nothing’s going to change,” Maya reminded him. “We promised.”

“I know. I know and despite whatever happens, I want you to be in my life forever, Maya.”

Maya smiled. “That’s all I want too Josh.”

“Good, we’re agreed then,” Josh said. “No matter what happens, we are going to be together. Forever.”

Maya didn’t know he was looking at her hopefully.

**.**

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> First of all, my trip this past week was canceled because we had a huge snowstorm! So, that’s why I didn’t update on Wednesday like I planned. I had planned to update yesterday but the day got away with me. Which was funny because I didn’t do anything except turn a year older.
> 
> Okay, so I realize how oblivious Maya is right now. I have a kind of headcanon for this story where ignorance is bliss and maybe she knows everybody is right but she doesn’t want to believe it. If that makes any sense at all.
> 
> Anyways, Josh will be dropping the “L” bomb sooner than later. My plan is for them to do friendship things in chapters 1-4 with the fallout in chapters 6-9. I bet you can guess what happens in chapter 10. You’ve been reading me for a while now.
> 
> Sorry for the shortness of this chapter. I didn’t want to force anymore because I felt like there was a balance at the end of the chapter and I didn’t want to break it.
> 
> I’ll be back next Friday with the next installment. 
> 
> And damn, I just got on the Hamilton train. I am SO obsessed! I cannot stop replaying the songs over and over again. GO LISTEN TO IT! 
> 
> Lastly, this chapter is completely unedited. All mistakes are mine!
> 
> Until Next Time!


	10. Chapter 9

**.**

**Chapter 8**

**_“I take Peter’s hand. I put it on my heart. I tell him, you have to take good care of this because it’s your’s. He looks at me in such a way that I know for sure. He’s never looked at another girl quite like this. And then I am in his arms, and we’re hugging and kissing and we’re both shaking because we both know this is the night we become real.”_ **

**P.S I Still Love You, Jenny Han**

**_“Please be patient, give me time ‘cause I’ve been known to change my mind, but even when I do I keep on coming back to you.”_ **

**Every Little Thing, Louisa Wendorff**

He was in the bookstore all by himself, shelving books. He looked like he was wearing his heartbreak on his sleeve. Maya was overwhelmed with guilt because she had been the one to do it to him.

Yes, he had broken his promises to her but it wasn’t his fault. Sometimes you just couldn’t help who you fell in love with. She understood that really well now.

She closed her eyes and then took the stone steps leading up into the bookstore. It was time for her to make things better. She only hoped he wouldn’t reject _her_ even though she would deserve it because sometimes what went around came around all over again.

It was the reap what you sow thing that Maya didn’t want to deal with even if she had to.

She pushed the door open, the familiar bell above it ringing.

“I’ll be with you in a minute,” Josh said.

Maya was soothed by the familiar, she’d been here before. “Josh. . .”

Josh looked up, shock registered on his face when he saw her standing in front of him. He didn’t say anything, not even _hello_. He waited for her to speak first.

“Josh. . .” Maya repeated, walking towards him, twisting her bracelet around her wrist and choosing her next words carefully. “You have no idea how much I’ve missed you. . .”

Josh clutched the pile of books he was holding to his chest like he was defending himself from what was coming next. “I’ve missed you too,” he answered, his voice sounding hollow and far away and not at all like her best guy friend.

“Josh. . .” Maya trailed off because she didn’t really know what else to say, how to tell him even though he deserved to know. Deserved to be put out of his misery, the misery _she_ had caused him. “I love you too.”

“What?” Josh asked, looking a little surprised.

“I love you.”

Josh put the books down on a bookshelf and got off of the ladder he had been standing on, making his way over to her cautiously. “Do you mean it?” he asked.

“Yes,” Maya answered.

“You don’t love me like a brother or a friend?” Josh checked.

“No,” she replied, gesturing at her red dress and white shoes. “Do you think I’d come here dressed like someone from a scene from a movie if I only loved you like a sister loved her brother?”

“I’m not sure,” Josh said. “You haven’t liked any boys in all the years _this_ has been going on between us.”

“It’s because it’s only ever been you,” Maya told him sincerely. “I really mean it Josh. I hope you know that.”

“So, that’s it then?” Josh asked, reaching out to touch her face. “This is the kind of declaration you’re giving me? I have to say I am shocked, with you standing there looking like a movie.”

“What do you want me to do? Throw my arms around you and call you _darling_ like in all those period dramas we’ve watched?”

“I’m pretty sure Marianne never threw her arms around Colonel Brandon and called him, _darling_ ,” Josh said, weaving his fingers through her hair.

“Colonel Brandon and Marianne? I thought we were more like Elizabeth and Mr. Darcy!”

“So, you read the book then?”

“Not all of it. I read the quote you underlined and your note,” Maya answered. “But I knew before then.”

“Knew what?” Josh asked breathlessly.

“How I felt. I knew almost the second you walked away from me. But I was too scared to. . .” Maya trailed off and put her hand on his, closing his eyes as his other hand skirted up her other cheek and he rested his forehead against her’s. “. . .to admit it. I came here today with every intention of painting you pictures with my words and all I can say is I am _so_ sorry and I love you too. Please say you still feel the same way about me.”

Josh kissed her then and it was like time stood still. He pulled away and laughed at her, looking like for all the world he was trying not to cry. “Do you think I could get over you in such a short amount of time? It’s only been a few days, Maya. I didn’t even try. I love you.”

He pulled her close and held onto her tightly. They stayed that way for a very long time. 

**.**

Josh slid into the booth and kissed Maya. “Sorry I’m late,” he said. “Star didn’t come until late and Robert asked me to stay until she got there.”

Maya smiled. “It’s okay. I got your text.”

“So, why did you want to meet me today?”

“Do I have to have a reason to meet you?” Maya asked.

“No,” Josh answered. “But your voicemail last night made me think it was something more than just seeing me.”

“You’re right. I called you here today at _this_ table to because there’s something we need to discuss. A retraction.”

“A retraction?” Josh repeated. “What do you mean?”

“Of the rules and all the promises we made each other.”

“Maya, I think we’ve already done _that_ ,” Josh said.

“Well then, we need to make new promises.”

“Oh _no_! I am _not_ making any more promises!” Josh replied. “ _No way!_ I learned my lesson the first time. It’s impossible to make promises you can’t keep!”

“Okay.”

“Except. . .”

“Except?” Maya repeated, looking at him and fighting a smile.

“Except. . .” Josh covered her heart with his hand. “I _promise_ to take care of your heart because I know it’s a big deal that you entrusted _me_ with it. I _promise_ to not make you sad and to always cheer you up when you are sad. Even if it is my fault and I promise to love you completely.”

Maya covered her hand with his. “You _better_ take care of my heart.”

“I will, I will!” Josh assured her. “Do you promise too?”

“Yes!” Maya answered instantly. _“Of course!”_

And then he kissed her and it felt more real than anything in Maya’s life had ever felt before.

 

**The End**

 

**.**

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And that’s all for this story. Except not really. I kind of have (maybe) two more one-shots in this series. One I am definitely going to write and one I might write. March is going to be a month of one-shots. I hope you’re all board on for that!
> 
> I was only inspired this week to bring them back to where they both started. I knew I’d have them in the bookstore when Maya told him how she felt about him since the beginning. I really hope you will tell me what you thought. I quite enjoyed writing this story for you guys. 
> 
> Thank you for sticking with it!
> 
> Until Next Time!

**Author's Note:**

> Have I captured your interest? I truly hope so! I’ve been reading a lot of YA novels these days, they partially inspired some of this story even though other parts have been in my mind since early autumn. I hope you’ll stick around for more and that you will tell me what you think.
> 
> A few notes, I will not be posting January 22nd because a.) We’re going out of town for the weekend and b.) It is my birthday. Although, if we were here I would probably still post the next chapter. We are not going out of town because it is my birthday though. Secondly, I am going to be working on a tag to Girl Meets Home for the Holidays because we never got to see the trip to Upstate NY. And lastly, I am going to be posting bi-weekly updates of Sabrina. 
> 
> I’ll be back with more soon!


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